Tag: four questions

How do you know when the next step is in front of you, or if it's just the next shiny new thing that's trying to manipulate your time and energy?

If you don’t have a goal, set some time aside and get very clear about what you’d like the end result to be.

If you already know what the goal is, ask yourself if there is something that you’re resisting doing that’s keeping you from that goal.

Often times, if there’s a subconscious fear in taking action, something shiny will pop up to distract you.

You’ll need to be very honest with yourself about this, as your mind will create stories around why you’re resisting something.

Let me give you an example:

If your goal is to enroll more clients, and you KNOW your next step is to make sales calls, but instead you sign up for a class to learn how to build a website, you’re using the website class as a distraction.

And the insidious thing is that you will have yourself convinced that when you finish the class, you’ll magically have those new clients enrolled.

When you really want a clear gauge to help you make a decision, I always recommend that you turn to the FOUR QUESTIONS.

So let’s use the example above and run it through using the FOUR QUESTIONS.

1) Is this something I want to be, do or have? In the instance of the web class, yes.

2) Is being, doing or having this taking me closer to my goal? In this instance the answer would be no because it would be taking the person farther from it. They already know that the most direct way to enroll clients is to make sales calls.

3) Is being, doing or having this in alignment with Universal Law (more life to all)? Yes

4) Does being, doing or having this violate the rights of others (does it take away someone else’s right to choose)? No

The determining factor in using these questions is that you must answer yes to the first three questions, and no to the fourth.

Since the answer to the 2nd question was a no, this person would not choose to take the web class. Instead they would focus on working through their resistance to sales calls.

When experiencing indecision, using the four questions above, will help you see clearly which direction to take.

PS: The Neagle Code: Directions for Life is a weekly no-cost program that is open to everyone! Each week, I'll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: www.DavidNeagle.com/ask-david to participate.

PS: The Neagle Code: Directions for Life is a weekly no-cost
program that is open to everyone! Each week, I'll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: www.DavidNeagle.com/ask-david to participate.

In my most recent article, I shared the first of two favorite tactics of the subconscious mind to keep you where you are.

That first tactic is our tendency to look for the magic pill, the easy solution, rather than choosing the option that requires us to change and which, therefore, leads to success.

The second tactic is what I call the rabbit hole of the subconscious mind.

The Rabbit Hole
Often when people get stuck and feel they can’t move forward, they think that a block stemming from a childhood trauma of some kind is holding them back. So they start focusing on what that could be, thinking if they could just remember or figure it out, they’d be able to release the block and start moving again.

The trouble is they’ve just fallen into a trap ~ the rabbit hole of the subconscious mind. They could stay on a therapist’s couch for 20 years, looking for memories, talking about change but not making any, and, therefore, unlikely to make the real growth that leads to the big wins.

It’s Your Excuse
The thing that’s holding you back is your excuse: what you say to yourself in the moment about why you can’t do something that would take you where you want to go.

For instance, when you say, “I can’t go to the event because I don’t have the money or I don’t have the time,” that is in your imagination. You do have the money. The Law of Polarity says that’s true. If you have a desire, the way to fulfill that desire is also around you. And you have 24 hours in every day just like everybody else. You get to decide what to do with it.

Your Excuse Is Perfect for You
But you don’t see it that way, because your subconscious mind knows the perfect way to stop you. The excuse you come up with is totally logical, makes sense emotionally and is tailor made just for you. It’s so perfect, you can’t see any way around it.

And if you don’t bring in some other knowledge or perspective, you never will get around it. It’s another trap. And you will remain stuck.

How to Get Unstuck
You need people in your life, like a coach, to call you on the excuses you use to hinder your growth. You need to become aware of what you say to yourself so that you can stop believing it, and then employ helpful ways to make decisions.

For instance, if you’re considering whether to go to an event or take a class or start a project, ask yourself The 4 Questions I shared with you recently. If you get a green light, your answer is yes. Take advantage of the opportunity.

Stop making excuses and, instead, make the changes you need to make, and along the way you will grow. You will see your path lighted a step at a time before you, leading you toward your goal.

Numerous opportunities are around us at any given moment. We’re drawn to a particular seminar or we want to start teaching; we’re offered a new job or we consider going back to school.

One or two of these opportunities will take us closer to our goal, but others will not be beneficial. Our subconscious can disguise our opportunities ~ making them seem fortunate when they’re not or making them seem unfortunate when they’re the perfect one for you.

Remember my story about driving the fuel truck? That opportunity years ago was around me for two years while I worked on the loading dock, but rather than seeing it as an opportunity, I used to say, “Why would anyone want to drive a bomb on wheels?”

And, yet, it was the right opportunity for me because, through it, I doubled my income while conquering the fear of fire that had been programmed in me at a very young age.

Seeing the true nature of your opportunities is crucial. That’s why, last time, I gave you an exercise to help you do just that. Today, I’m going to show you how to choose the right opportunity, the one that will take you to your goal.

You’ll need your answers to the last exercise, so here it is again:

Exercise:

Unmask Your Opportunities

Step 1. Write down your “need,” the amount to the penny of your monthly bills. If you are meeting your need every month, write down what you want, your financial goal.

Step 2. Make a list of every opportunity that comes to mind that could help you meet your need or want. No matter how far-fetched or unappealing or scary the idea may seem, write it down.

Step 3. Every opportunity has at least one challenge associated with it ~ something that makes you think the opportunity would be difficult or impossible to pull off. The most common challenges are not enough money or time, issues with a loved one or prior commitments. Look at your list and write down the challenges that arise as you think about each opportunity.

Step 4. Each challenge you wrote down is another opportunity in disguise. It’s an opportunity for you to overcome that challenge and grow. Look at your list of challenges and imagine the opportunities they are presenting for you.

The Right Opportunity Is Key

The right opportunity + action = success. Every time, without fail. Since you may still have a few viable options on your list, to help you narrow the field to the best one, run each of your opportunities through the following four questions and only these four questions.

Question 1. Is this opportunity something I want to be, do or have?

If your answer is “yes” move on to Question 2.

If you answered no, move on to your next opportunity. However, to make sure that you’re seeing the true nature of your opportunity, look at your list of disguised opportunities in the challenges that you associated with this opportunity in Step 4 above. Is one or more of those disguised opportunities something you want do, be or have? If you answered no to the opportunity, but yes to the disguised opportunity, move on to Question 2.

For instance, if I answered this question with, “Hell no, I don’t want to drive a bomb on wheels,” I would then ask myself if I wanted to conquer my fear of fire while doubling my income. Of course, my answer would be yes, so I would move on to Question 2.

Question 2. Will the opportunity take me closer to my goal?

Be really honest. If your need is $5K a month and your opportunity is a full-time job for $20/hr., it will not help you meet your goal. Instead, it will further ensnare you where you are. If your answer is “yes” move on to Question 3.

Question 3. Is the opportunity in harmony with the laws of the universe, the primary law of more life?

“More life” means more freedom, abundance, prosperity, etc. Would the opportunity bring you more life? If your answer is “yes” move on to Question 4.

Question 4. Would this opportunity violate the rights of others?

Would it take away someone else’s choice? For example, if an opportunity would have you be secretive or deceptive with your spouse, you’re violating his or her right of choice because you’re making decisions that will affect your spouse, but not including him or her in the decision. You’re looking for the answer “no” to Question 4.

If you get three yeses and a no, the opportunity will move you in the right direction and you can feel confident about taking it.

After running each of your opportunities through the four questions, you may end up with one clear winner or you may find that a couple of them will actually work together to help you reach your goal.

In any case, your next step is to seize the opportunity and see it all the way through to its conclusion. I’ll talk to you about that next time.