[5 Pillars of Influence Article Series] Article #4 ~ What Is the “Why” Behind Your Sales Style?

In this series I’m teaching you how to master the art of influence, so you have the power to change business problems into profitable opportunities ~ including turning the objections of your prospects into iron-clad commitments.

Part of that process involves identifying which of the four main styles feels most comfortable to you when conducting sales conversations.

Are you:

• The “warm friend”?

• The “stern parent”?

• The “seducer”?

• Or the “shamer”?

Being able to name your natural sales style is important, so that you can then ask yourself why.

The Why

Why does it feel more comfortable for you to employ that particular style in your sales conversations?

You want to know the answer to that question so that you can determine whether or not your comfort stems from emotional weakness.

For instance, are you their “friend,” because you know that warmth, enthusiasm and good will can encourage prospects to take a scary leap of faith? Or, are you friendly in your sales conversations because you’re afraid you’re going to upset somebody? Or because you have the need to be liked?

Are you the “seducer,” because you think that sex appeal is your only appeal and the only way to get people to listen to you? Or, are sensuality and a playful allure natural expressions that draw people to you like a magnet?

Are you the “shamer” because you have the need to belittle others in order to feel superior? Or do you truly want to help people step into a new and uncomfortable change ~ and you know that this style is very effective in psychologically triggering the audience to accept the offer.

Is the “stern parent” comfortable because you always have to be in control? Or, do you know that your direct and matter-of-fact truth-telling are the best swords for cutting through the haze of your prospects’ denial and fear?

Now What?

As you can see, there are potential positives and negatives associated with each style. So what do you do if your why stems from a weak place?

First, you need to face that weakness, and acknowledge what it’s costing you and your clients.

For example, it’s likely decreasing your sales, undermining your influence with others, and greatly diminishing your effectiveness as a leader, teacher or coach.

Next, you need to start influencing yourself. You don’t necessarily need to change the style that feels comfortable to you, just get rid of the fear that currently fuels it.

For example, let’s say, like a lot of people, you have a warm friend style because you’re afraid of making somebody upset. If that’s the case, you need to push through that fear and give yourself another experience.

So the next time in a sales conversation, when you feel that inner prompting to speak up or tell the truth or guide the conversation to an uncomfortable place, and you’re afraid to, do it anyway.

Show yourself that you and the other person can survive a little upset.

In fact, not only can you both survive it, but your pushing through your own fear can lead to a breakthrough for both of you.

And then your warm encouragement can be the perfect soft landing to then guide your prospect to his or her next step.

What is that next step?

Very likely, it’s working with you.


David Neagle, The Million Dollar Income Acceleration Mentor and author of The Millions Within, teaches entrepreneurs and commission-based sales professionals how to quantum leap their current incomes past the 7-figure income level, often in less than 12 months. As a world-class speaker, sales trainer, and success-mindset mentor to some of the globe’s top CEOs, David also privately mentors big decision-makers in their pursuit of quantum success and peace of mind.