This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.
My intention is to have monthly events to make money, do what I love and grow my community. I am flying high at and after my events, on top of the world — until the day after when my negativity comes in. I start thinking that people don't like me anymore; I question whether they'll come back. It gets weird in my head. This is clearly an issue. I have been doing my best to stop it when it happens, breathe and bring in new thoughts. It's almost torture at times. I hate that I do this to myself but also happy that I am conscious of it now. So what I wonder, are there any additional techniques on how to flip the switch on these thoughts and interrupt the pattern — as well as stay in that I’m-great-and-did-a-great-job energy??
Hi! Thanks for your question and your honesty.
It’s wonderful that you are conscious of this pattern in your life, but you must do more than breathe and bring in new thoughts… you must build your self-esteem.
You see, the reason you feel on top of the world after your event is because you are feeding off of the energy and appreciation of the audience. Once that acknowledgement and appreciation fade, your wound re-appears.
A person with a fully developed self-esteem would speak from stage because that is what they are meant to do. They wouldn’t care who liked them or appreciated them.
I always tell my audience, that my job is not to be their friend, and I don’t care if they like me or not.
I know that I have a message to speak, and the people who need to hear will, and those that aren’t ready, won’t. Either way, at the end of the day, I feel good about me and the fact that I’ve given my best to help whomever is willing to listen.
For you, I’d suggest taking a deep look at your need for appreciation and acknowledgement.
Why do you need this from the audience?
Why do you need them to like you, when whether or not they like you is actually none of your business.
Once you begin to take steps to build your self-esteem you’ll find yourself becoming less worried about what others think, and more powerful from stage.
PS: The Neagle Code: Directions for Life is a weekly no-cost program that is open to everyone! Each week, I'll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: www.DavidNeagle.com/ask-david to participate.