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You Can’t (and Shouldn’t) Help Everyone

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I’m having inconsistency in my business, and it’s bothering me. My goal is make more money and have less confusion and fewer steps to get there. I want to have fewer, higher paying clients. I know I can get these bigger clients, but I keep taking all the little clients.

I want to help them all. When someone comes to me, it’s like, “Why would I say no to someone who wants to pay me money? If I say no to this person, what if something else doesn’t come along?” But when I do that, I have less time to find that bigger client. What should I do?

Neagle Code Answer

That’s coming from fear.

It’s actually out of integrity for you to take every client. You can’t—and shouldn’t—help everyone.

As a professional, your job is to determine whether you can really help someone or not… and if you should help them or not.

You have to look at your own criteria. Consider:

  • How you want to run your business
  • The freedom you want
  • The amount of money you want to make
  • The people whom you can help

There will be always someone who wants your help, who you probably shouldn’t work with. You have to learn how to discern that—and not take those clients, even if they’re willing to pay you.

That’s not okay. If you do that, you lose. And you hurt your own integrity.

I know it seems crazy, but it’s a lack mindset to think otherwise.

You’ll feel so good about yourself when you tell someone, “No,” who seriously wants to pay you—because they don’t fit the criteria for working with you. That feels so good.

You’ll realize you’re overcoming your own fear of lack when you do that, which indicates growth—and that’s really good.

Remember…
you shouldn’t help everyone,
even if you CAN help them.

You mentioned that you want to work with “big clients.” So keep that in mind when you’re speaking to a potential client. Use a discerning process to look at whether a client fits your criteria.

Is the person who’s coming to you for help a “big” client? If the answer is yes, then you can proceed and figure out whether or not you can help them.

If the answer is no, then it’s not a match. Move on. Because you can’t help everyone.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This October, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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How Can I Make Money if My Email List Isn’t Responding?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

My question is that I’m still not making any money in my business. I’ve fixed my messaging, and upped my branding. People in my industry are starting to notice me. But I don’t know where to get the leads.

I have 250 people on my email list. It’s very disengaged, even though I email frequently. I’ve reached out to every person via direct email. I asked them, “Are you looking to find THIS, or are you looking to do THAT?” I don’t know what the open rate was, because I emailed them individually.

No one is responding. And no one responded to my survey. That’s where I feel stuck. What would you recommend?

Neagle Code Answer

My CEO, Steph Tuss, is the master of this!

She recommends the following tips for re-engaging your email list:

  1. Rather than sending these emails personally, send them through your CRM, so you can track open rates
  2. Resend an email, but don’t send a “this or that” email. They’re all on your list because they’re looking for something specific. Deliver VALUE before asking them do to anything in return.
  3. Fulfill the promise of why they’re on your list to begin with—what are they looking for?
  4. Send out a 9-word email to your list. It doesn’t necessarily have to be nine words, but it’s very simple. It should be a one sentence question. You could send something like, “Are you still interested in [whatever your main thing is]?” And that’s it. Sign off with just your name (no fancy headshot, phone number, email, or anything). They’ll either respond with “yes,” “no,” or they won’t respond at all. If they don’t respond at all, then you can assume the topic of your question is no longer something they are interested in.
  5. Use a good subject line. For a 9-word email, an example subject line is, “Question for you…”
  6. The next time you do a survey to your list, give them an incentive for answering the survey (because no one fills out a survey without experiencing “what’s in it for them”).

Anyone with a service-based business can send out this type of an email, including attorneys, coaches, or other businesses.

The email should not be about you at all. It shouldn’t be what you’re offering. It shouldn’t be anything about you.

It should be one single question:
“Are you still interested in… X?”

That should be the reason that they’re on your list, and following you, to begin with.

At my company, we sometimes send out an email saying, “Are you still interested in growing your business?” Period. (You might have gotten an email like that from us before.)

When they respond, this puts you into a conversation back and forth with the people who are still interested and ready for help.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This October, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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How Do I Overcome Imposter Syndrome?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

The term “imposter syndrome” keeps coming up in my awareness. Can you speak to the meaning of that? What is your understanding of imposter syndrome?

Neagle Code Answer

Imposter syndrome is when your self-image doesn’t match up with the direction you want to go… and you don’t feel worthy of what you actually want in life.

Obviously, that needs to be changed at a self-image level.

There’s a quote from “A Course in Miracles” about self-image. If you’re having an issue with your self-image, you should read it 50 times a day, and behave as if you’re that person:

“The truth about you is so lofty that nothing unworthy of God is worthy of you. Choose, then, what you want in these terms and accept nothing that you would not offer to God as wholly fitting for Him.”

This is the only way to change your self-image once you’re an adult.

Remember, the way you learned as a child is not the same way you learn as an adult. As a child, we learned by gathering information, remembering it, then feeding it back to someone… who then said we learned.

As an adult, our learning is experiential.

Once you’re an adult, if you want to change the results in your life, you have to acknowledge where you are and do something different.

If it’s an internal change you have to make, then you have to be willing to do things to raise your self-esteem to the level where you want to be.

This will never be an intellectual process first. It will always be behavioral first, intellectual second.

That means you step into the actions you’re taking to move forward.

Who do you want to be, while stepping into those actions?

This is where the rewiring of your mind happens. When you’re taking action, you develop the confidence to actually do it.

Imposter syndrome is literally feeling like an imposter. Feeling like, “This isn’t me. I’m stepping into this, and it’s not true.”

It’s all about doing the thing in order to become the person you want to be.

And remember — the part of you that doesn’t feel worthy is coming from someone else’s voice in your head.

It’s not your voice.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This October, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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When Do I Tell Prospects the Price?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

Can you help me understand where in the sales conversation I should be addressing pricing? Should I interject it right at the beginning of the call, or wait until they say yes to my service?

Neagle Code Answer

When they say yes to your service.

Think about this: What’s the purpose of the price?

You have to be very careful when it comes to price in the mind of the client. You don’t want the sale to be based on price. You want it to be based on the client’s need, desire, and urgency. That’s where you want the person to make the decision from.

You should know who your ideal client is so well, that you’re targeting people where price won’t be a psychological issue for them.

There are basically two kinds of people in the world:

  1. People trained from a young age to buy within certain price ranges
  2. People who aren’t

Now, I sell things that cost a lot of money, so I’m looking for people who feel that it’s normal to pay a certain amount of money for a service. If I go after people where their idea of “personal help” is to pay about $148, there’d be no way that I could charge for what I do.

So I take that into consideration.

Are these people trained to buy at certain price levels? Is it normal for them to buy at the price range I suggest?

If so, then it’s not an issue of whether or not they think the cost is too much.

The issue is, where can they come up with the money? That’s a natural progression into them paying.

If somebody comes right out and says, “Hey, how much does this cost?” I’ll tell them.

I won’t avoid the question.

But then I’ll talk about what’s important for them, because they’re not buying based on price. They should be buying based on necessity, urgency, and desire of what you have that they want.

I would totally have an open conversation around price with someone. If they say, “Okay listen, I just want to know the price,” I’d say, “Why do you want to know the price? Does it matter what the price is if you have this issue and it needs to be fixed?”

If it does matter, then the issue isn’t the most important thing in their life. How much money they have or don’t have is the most important thing in their life, and they’ll always be limited by that evaluation in their mind.

The sales conversation needs to be about their problem and their desire to change it.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This October, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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How Do You Find Your Life’s Purpose?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

What would you tell someone who is trying to figure out their purpose in life?

Neagle Code Answer

The first thing for a person to understand is that they’re always in their purpose.

The second thing is that they should get comfortable answering the question, “What do I want?”

There’s no living thing on this planet that is confused about its purpose other than human beings. The only reason we’re confused about it is because our entire life, we’ve been told we can’t have it—in one way or another, either directly or indirectly.

The idea is to get to the place where you’re giving yourself permission and you don’t feel guilt or shame by what you really want. Then start following that.

If a person says they don’t know what they want—that’s not true. They DO know. They’re just not being honest.

I’ve never met anybody who doesn’t know what they want.

Get them to a place where they feel safe enough to share, so that they’ll tell you what they want.

The other direction I’ll give to people is this:

What do you think about in your secret thoughts?—the thoughts you don’t tell anybody about?

Because I guarantee you, they’re thinking about something.

They either think they can’t have it, they shouldn’t have it, or they have guilt or shame around wanting it.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! Next week, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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Why Do My Sales Prospects Back Out?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I keep getting objections during my sales calls. One person was ready to pay me through Venmo. Then she said, “I need to sleep on this.” Another person wanted to buy, but she was considering going with someone else’s program because of the payment timeline. She needed more time to pay my fee.

Am I doing something unconsciously that’s not attracting the people who want to hire me?

Neagle Code Answer

No—you just don’t know how to answer the questions that are coming up. Those are all legitimate questions. We get that kind of stuff every day in my company.

If someone wants to do your program but they say, “I need to sleep on this,” here’s how you respond.

Say, “You know what? I totally understand that. And if you want to sleep on it, you must have some unanswered questions. What are those questions? Let’s talk about those now.”

You need to do determine whether it’s BS, or if she just doesn’t have the guts to say no. Probably 80% of the time, the person doesn’t want to say no. It’s very difficult for people to tell someone no. They’re too concerned about what you’ll think.

If it’s legitimate, she’ll tell you what the questions are. Once you understand what the problem is, you can help her work through it.

Let’s say you’re going back and forth, and she keeps coming up with another excuse.

I’d say, “Listen, hang on a second. If you don’t want to do this, please know that you can just tell me no. I’m not going to hold it against you. I’m not going to pressure you. Just say no if you don’t want to do it. But it sounds like you’re making excuses.”

If the person’s a no, you don’t want them in. If you have to drag them in, you’ll have to drag them around. You don’t want that.

Give them permission to say no,
then move on to somebody who wants to say yes.

It feels extremely clean when you do it that way.

If someone wants your program, but they’re trying to decide between yours and someone else’s—ask them, “If everything was the same (pricing and payment timelines), which one would you want to do the most? Which one speaks to your heart the most?”

If she wants your program, help her work it out. Say, “If you really want to work with me, there must be a way to overcome this problem to do it. Let’s not let money or the timeframe stand in the way. How can we solve this problem? How can we work on finding that much money? Where can you get it? What can you do to get that money? If you really desire to do this, that money has to be there.”

The question comes down whether they want it bad enough. How can they earn the money to pay for it?

Then you’re solving the real problem. If it’s not a real problem, you flush the BS right to the surface. Then you can let that person go.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This month, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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Is Self-Judgment Helpful?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

My question is around self-judgment. I really resonate with the idea of accepting who you are and what you’ve done in the past.

However, this idea bothers me bit. There are certain standards I want to set for different things in my life. How do I maintain these certain standards if I’m not judging myself? When is self-judgment appropriate?

Neagle Code Answer

Self-judgment isn’t ever appropriate. It does nothing.

You can look at yourself critically and say, “Here are things about me that need to be fixed, that I need to work on, that I can get better at.”

But to feel guilt or shame—or to make yourself a bad person because of it—that’s self-abuse.

You want to judge the result or outcome, not you.

If I get a result that I don’t want, I say, “Okay, what’s the standard that I want to create for myself to get a different result?”

I don’t judge myself as “bad” because of it.

Here’s the truth. If you don’t get the result you want—it’s either due to ignorance, or it’s due to a program you picked up when you were a kid. That’s all it is.

You can get the correct information so that you’re no longer ignorant. AND you can change your internal program, so that you’re no longer held back by your old belief system. (With both of these, it helps to work with a coach who’s been where you want to be.)

There doesn’t have to be any self-judgment around it at all.

Nobody ever felt better by making themselves feel bad.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This month, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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How Do I Change the Way I React?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I’ve heard you say, “Training habituates reactions to any circumstance.” When I make a mistake, I find that I tend to have a strong, negative reaction. For example, let’s say I made a typo in a piece of paperwork that I filed. Nobody may notice it, but I notice it when I’m reviewing it. I’m mortified and I’m afraid someone will find out and laugh at me. That’s where my brain usually goes — “I can’t believe I made this stupid mistake.”

How I can habituate a better reaction when I make a mistake?

Neagle Code Answer

First ask yourself: what’s the reaction I want to have?

Most people will answer in the negative, like, “It’s okay, I’m not a bad person, and nothing bad will happen.”

But let’s make it more positive. You could say you want gratitude to be your first reaction.

Why gratitude? Because mistakes teach us the greatest lessons in life. So let’s be grateful for them. Work having on deep, profound gratitude for any mistake you make—as if it’s really important.

In the example you gave with the typo… where is the deep and profound gratitude for the typo?

The answer is: it points out how you view yourself negatively. So now you know what to change.

It has nothing to do with the typo. It’s actually showing you about yourself.

When you start to look at mistakes in this manner, you’ll eventually retrain yourself to have a different reaction every time.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! This month, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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Should I Pay My Rockstar Team Members More?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I have two “rockstar” team members who are asking for 3x their salary. Hands down, they’re worth that amount.

I’d feel guilty paying them more, because the rest of my team is paid based in their country’s currency. If I pay the rockstars U.S. wages, it seems unfair to those who aren’t as capable—because maybe they’re disadvantaged, their life was harder, or they’re a single mom or something.

How should I approach this?

Neagle Code Answer

If one person is a rockstar and one is mediocre and you’re paying them the same for the same position—you’re going to lose the rockstar eventually.

The mediocre one should probably be let go, and you should hire a second rockstar.

It’s not personal.

Let’s say someone is showing up every day, giving their best—and they’re just not getting there. That’s probably the wrong position for them.

I tell people, “Find a place where you can be the rockstar of your own life.” If they can’t get there, they should probably look for something different.

That’s not your burden to carry.

You’re responsible TO people, not FOR them.

Everyone has a hard life. Everyone’s on their own journey. How determined are they to change their circumstances?

It’s their responsibility to clean up their life.

As the business owner—and their boss—you can do your team a great benefit by having those truthful conversations with them.

Be transparent. Tell them, “Look, I’d love to pay you as much as the next person. But you’ve got to clean up these issues before you can get there. You COULD be a rockstar, but it won’t happen until you clean things up. You’ll probably perform way better once you do.”

Consider how a professional sports team is run. The best person gets the job… period. People who aren’t the best go somewhere else, even if the coach loves that person.

The coach makes hard decisions in the best interests of the team.

That’s how you need to see yourself. The best player gets the spot. If they’re not the best, they need to go somewhere else—maybe somewhere where they’re looking for a “B player” or “C player,” rather than an “A player.”

If you have B and C players on your team, working with A players—those A players will leave, because A players want to work with other A players.

Don’t do a disservice to your A player, your B player, AND to your company.

Remember, it’s a team—not a family. Everyone is gunning for those spots, while taking responsibility to do their best. If someone isn’t doing their best, have a conversation about why. Then it’s a decision on what to do about it.

Recommended Reading
No Rules Rules: Netflix and the Culture of Reinvention by Reed Hastings

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! In April 2022, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

Save

Should I Give My Team a Raise?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I have a large team, and I’m making my best efforts to pay everyone at the upper range of their pay scale for each position. However, people are constantly asking for a raise. This triggers a reaction in me and fear that if I don’t give them what they’re asking for, they’ll leave.

I feel guilt that I can’t pay everybody double or even triple what I’m paying them. How do I handle this?

Neagle Code Answer

First off, I think it’s great that they’re asking for a raise. I want people who will ask for a raise, because that generally shows that they want to improve.

When someone asks for a raise, consider 2 things—their performance, and what you’re willing to pay around the scale for that job.

Ask yourself:

  1. Does the employee deserve a raise (regardless of whether they’re at the top of pay scale or not)?
  2. Where do you want to draw a line with how much you pay people?

That’s a personal decision and a business decision.

Secondly, everybody can be replaced. Don’t ever put it in your mind that you have somebody who can’t be replaced. Otherwise you’ll back yourself into a corner.

Some people are more difficult to replace than others, which may require that you pay them a bit more if you feel that they—and their position—are worth it.

If someone is in a position where you’re not going to pay any more, tell them that upfront. Say, “Listen, you’re already at top of the pay scale. The only way you’re going to get a raise is if the scale increases.”

Is there a place for advancement for that person?

It’s like knowing what their hopes and dreams are, and seeing if that’s a match for your company.

If there’s no advancement possible for them, then you need to let them know. You can say, “If a promotion is not what you’re looking for, and if you don’t want to advance in the company, then I completely understand if you want to move on.”

That’s part of owning a business—knowing that some people aren’t meant to stay in that position for the rest of their life, and you’ll have to replace them.

You’re also looking at individual performance data for the person and their position.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Summit! In April 2022, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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