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What Am I Responsible For?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I’ve heard you say we’re responsible for controlling our thoughts, what we say, and what we put out there to market our business. But we’re not responsible for how another person interprets what we say. “I’m not responsible for what someone understands.” Does that mean I’m not supposed to care about how they respond? Should I try to help them even if they don’t get it?

Neagle Code Answer

There’s a difference between not being responsible for how they interpret it and trying to help them see it in a more productive light.

If someone is working with me, I’ll always go to the 9th or 10th degree to help them see things in a more productive light—because I know they’re stuck. I know they’re coming from the reality of their current experience, or from a past story, or maybe even trauma in their life. And I know how difficult it is to break through that.

When a person completely rejects what you’re saying or trying to do, there’s nothing you can do about that.

Just understand that they’re responsible for how they interpret it and for what they decide to do with that information.

It’s totally okay to try to help a person understand something. But look at the context. Why are you having a conversation with this person to begin with?

Did they ask for help?

If they didn’t ask for help, in my opinion, it’s not our right to run in and save people.

My mentor Bob Proctor told me, “Everybody has a right to be as miserable as they want to be.”

We make ourselves miserable when we start going out there and trying to correct everybody else.

We have enough work to do on our own plate.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! In April 2022, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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I Feel Guilty for Buying Anything

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

Lately, I’ve been struggling with buyer’s remorse on 98% of things I buy.

When COVID hit, I still wasn’t earning anything from my business. My husband and I don’t have problems with money. But for the first time, he was worried about money. I got pregnant, and we considered pulling our daughter from daycare to cut expenses. I became an “extreme coupon” person, and now I have remorse for everything I buy. Even with groceries, I’m like, “Do I really need that?” How can I drop this habit?

Neagle Code Answer

Part of it is, it’s a way for you not to feel guilty about starting a business. You have to look at what your husband’s experience was—and your reaction to his experience in that moment. You created a new habit of asking, “Should I not buy this? Should I not do this?”

It’s kind of like, “Well, I’m going to do it anyway.” It’s a way for you to re-project your guilt in a different direction.

Here’s how you change this.

You change it by raising your standard of how you want to live your life. You never cut things to go down to where your income is. You raise your income to what your standard is, so cutting is no longer an option.

Once you become aware that you can manifest whatever you want, you never cut anything to go lower unless you actually want to go lower.

Let’s say a family wants to downsize. There’s no problem with that. But if you’re doing it because you think you have no control over your income, that’s a problem. You start to go unconscious again. Then you start coming up with alternate behaviors (like extreme coupon cutting).

You need to create a vision and a standard for your marriage, your life, and your finances—and then raise everything up to meet that standard.

That’s where you put your energy. You raise it up.

It’s no longer about questioning whether you need something or not. It’s about saying, “This is the standard I’m living at, and I completely accept that in my life.” Then you don’t have a conflict of interest or a value conflict going on subconsciously.

Once you’ve raised your standard, that’s it. Now your standard has to be higher.

There should be no going back.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! In April 2022, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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When You Doubt Your Own Ability…

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

My question is around setting goals. I have two different businesses, and I tend to dance back and forth between the two—not really moving forward to the degree I’d like with either of them. I keep thinking to myself, “I’m not taking the action. Why am I not taking the action?”

Is it because I’m struggling with keeping my word and meeting the goals I set for myself? Or am I just not fully committing? Part of it is, I think I’m avoiding what I imagine will be uncomfortable conversations with potential clients—the people I could (or should) be calling.

Any insight you can provide is so appreciated!

Neagle Code Answer

This is happening because you don’t believe you can accomplish the goal. You don’t think it’s really going to happen.

If you believed it, you’d be ready all the time.

It’s not really about a “lack of commitment.”

It’s all about the belief.

Think about this. Ask yourself, “What’s the truth about this?” The fact that you’re not taking action is a secondary cause (i.e., an effect).

What’s the truth about that? Why are you not taking the action? Because you either don’t want it, or you don’t believe it’s really possible.

When it comes to having “uncomfortable conversations” with potential clients, you have to first look at the conversation you’re having with yourself.

  • Are you telling yourself you’re not enough?
  • Are you telling yourself you can’t provide the result they want?
  • Are you telling yourself they won’t want what you’re selling?

What’s the conversation you’re having with yourself? If you’re telling yourself you’re not good enough—it’s because you don’t believe you can do it.

This is a problem of belief, not commitment.

You’re creating a story to validate the belief that you can’t do this.

Here’s a simple 2-part exercise to overcome this. First, spend an hour coming up with every reason in your mind why this won’t work—or why it can’t work. Write it all down on a piece of paper. Then give yourself a break.

Come back to it again the next day. Then write down every reason why it CAN work.

Don’t judge your answers. Don’t change anything. Don’t say, “I know that’s not true.” Just do the exercise. It’s extremely simple.

Write down every reason why it can’t (or won’t) work, then take a long break. Come back and write down every reason why it CAN work.

Then email both of those things to me, and I’ll get back to you after I see it.

(Want personalized support with this exercise? Reach out to my team by emailing support@davidneagle.com and we’d be happy to help!)

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! Next week, October 13-15th, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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How Do I Stop Blocking the Sale?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

During my sales calls, I’ve noticed that if I don’t expect anything from the prospect—if I show up relaxed, with no agenda—the customer often says, “Yes,” and I make the sale. If I’m not attached to any specific outcome, the conversation flows much easier.

However, if I expect the sale to happen, there’s usually no sale. Then I start to feel anxious about that. This has been happening a lot recently. What can I do to stop blocking the sale? How do I stay unattached to the outcome?

Neagle Code Answer

I would just focus on how you can help the other person.

When you’re blocking the sale, you’re thinking about you. You’re thinking about whether or not you’re doing it right, and whether or not you’re going to make the sale. You’re being self-conscious, or self-focused—which means you’re not present and not fully listening to the other person.

When I get on the phone with someone, I’m not thinking about me making the sale. My only concern is whether or not I can help this person. If I can help them, there’s going to be a sale.

The purpose of a sales conversation is to
figure out whether you can help someone.

That’s it.

It's not to push anything onto the other person.

You’re asking them questions about their situation, you’re listening, and you’re helping them connect the dots as to how your offering can help them (if it truly can).

Either you can help the person, or you can’t. If you can’t, you can simply say, “I don’t think it’s a right fit”—or refer them to someone who might be a better fit. No big deal.

If you come from a place of honestly trying to help someone, sales calls are not difficult at all. But you have to stop focusing on yourself and put the focus entirely on helping the other person.

I have a GREAT free blueprint on the exact questions you need to ask in any sales conversation. If you’d like a copy, find me on Instagram (@david_p_neagle) and simply DM me “BLUEPRINT”. I’ll pop it right over to you!

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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Time & Money Are Never the Issue—It’s Always Priorities

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

During my sales calls, people are like, “Yes, yes, yes!” Then when we start talking about the money, they say, “I don’t have the money”—or “I want to do this, but now’s not the right time.” How do I get around this?

Neagle Code Answer

If people are saying, “Yes, yes, yes,” and they’re not buying, then it sounds like your sales calls are out of balance somehow. When you start talking about money, if they’re telling you it’s too much—then you’re not doing the call properly.

Price is never the issue. Urgency is the issue.

Time is also never the issue—it’s always priorities.

If someone says they don’t have enough money—really, they don’t have enough urgency. You haven’t brought urgency to the forefront of the conversation, to the point where they want to do it right now.

Remember, one of the four questions in a sales call is: “What do you want?” You have to sit with the person until you’re certain they’re telling you exactly what they want.

There will always be an emotional connection to that answer.

There’s no coldness to it. There’s no flatness in their tone. You’ll hear an emotional expression in how they talk about it. They’ll have a sense of grief or loss around the idea of not getting it.

If you’re doing that and the money objection still comes up, don’t run away from it. If they say, “I don’t have the money” or “That’s a lot of money”—say, “Wait a second. Just relax for a minute. Let’s not worry about how much this costs right now. First of all, do you see the value in doing this?”

Start reminding them of why they said that they wanted this:

  • Why do you want this?
  • What will happen if you don’t do it?
  • Is all of what you just told me true?

When they say, “Yes,” ask, “Is it also true that if you could find the money, this would be something you’d want to do?” (That should also be a yes.)

Then say, “It’s not that you don’t have the money—it’s just that money is a challenge for you right now. What if we put our heads together and try to figure out a way for you to get the money to be able to do this? Let me advocate for you. Let me help you win.”

If that’s scary for you, then be willing to face that fear. That’s what you have to tell them.

Don’t be afraid to lose the sale.

There are so many ways for people to get money, it’s crazy. Money is so easy to get. But when your mind gets locked down around the fear of not having it…you’ll lose the sale or lose the client.

Always go back to: “How can I help this person?” with every call. It’s just two people having a conversation.

Allow yourself to be resourceful in your own psychology, so that you actually can help someone.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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I Keep Avoiding the Top-Priority Task on My List

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

One task I really need to work on is changing my program into a group model. I work on it every day, but it’s usually one of the last things I do. My quality of work might be better if I started on it earlier in the day. I feel like I should be doing more on it.

Even if I give myself a suggested time to finish it—other things always get in front of it and push it down the list. How do I get control of this?

Neagle Code Answer

You’re guaranteed not to fail if you can’t even start.

Every person I’ve ever seen do this, finds the perfect excuse not to get started—which protects them from failing, or having to confront what will happen if they complete the task.

Nothing “gets” in front of your high-priority task. YOU put things in front of it.

You have to stop doing that, and start playing hardball with yourself.

You have to prioritize and stick to doing it in the exact way you’re going to do it. It’s about keeping your commitment, so that you can get it done.

Once it’s done, you can work on the cause and effect—and make sure you’re getting the right results.

Then you can go in and work on what needs to be fixed in order to dial it in. If you’re not there yet, then whatever excuse is on the table will stop you.

I think you need to give yourself a firm completion date, then reverse engineer what needs to be done so that you hit that date.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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I’m Nervous I Won’t Be Able to Repeat It

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I recently had my best month ever—$20K. Then I went into my sabotage pattern of freaking out.

Recently I realized I didn’t have any sales calls booked. I manifested some calls, but each person freaked out because of the money.

I’m nervous, and not sure how to repeat my $20K month (especially with all the craziness and uncertainty in the world right now). I’m trying, but I don’t know if I can do it. What should I do?

Neagle Code Answer

First of all, you don’t “try” to do something—you do it. It’s just a decision.

Let’s work with what your subconscious mind is doing. You’re doubting that you can repeat the $20K month, and you’re using the current messages in the media as confirmation that you can’t.

Then don’t repeat it. Make more.

You can have some fun with this:

First… TURN OFF the news!
Second…take the weight off your goal, or it will become psychologically crushing. If you fail to reach it and completely blow it—remind yourself that you’ll be okay.

The world won’t come to an end if you don’t hit one of your goals.

So let’s play with this a bit. Come at it from the stronger, higher side of yourself. Step out against whatever your subconscious mind is suggesting to you.

Whatever your subconscious mind is suggesting you can’t do—it’s pointing you in the direction of what you CAN do. You can’t have one side without the other also existing.

When your subconscious mind says, “You can’t repeat the $20K month,” then don’t repeat it. Do more. Make more. See, it’s giving you the answer.

When someone challenges you about money on a sales call—have fun with it. Instead of taking it all “business serious,” I used to start playing with the other person and really challenging them on what they were challenging ME about.

Not that you’re doing this in a mean way—but really challenging them on what the excuse is. They’re talking with someone who can literally change their life, and they don’t even realize it. That’s why you charge what you charge.

When people said to me, “You really believe you’re worth $150,000?” I would say, “No, I believe you’re worth $150,000. You’re the one who’s paying the money. You’re the one who needs to feel that you’re worth it, not me.”

Think of the sales call as a hologram. You’re not fighting the other person—they’re a representation of your own belief system. You’re not going up against the other person—you’re going up against your own subconscious mind. You’re experiencing what your belief system is attracting.

We’re trying to help people understand THEIR worth.

They’re worth solving the problem, losing the weight, saving the marriage, building the business, and getting the results they want. It doesn’t matter what your product or service does. It betters somebody’s life.

And as far as letting in doubt… you are NOT alone in this. SO MANY business owners are getting caught up in the opposing messages in the media and they are freezing. I’m seeing it everywhere… and so I’ve decided to offer a FREE 60-Minute Training on How to Navigate Uncertainty During a Crisis this Tuesday at 2pm ET. CLICK HERE and my team will email you the details. It’s time to see the truth through all the chaos.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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Can You Just “Decide” to Be a Millionaire?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I’ve heard you say fear screams the loudest just before you make a decision. I had a goal to make seven figures. I’ve been doing “terror barrier stuff,” doing things I’ve never done before, and getting good at facing fears. “You get the courage to do the thing by doing a thing.” I did everything that would lead to making seven figures.

But if I’m honest, I never thought my goal would actually occur. I wasn’t worried about it, because I didn’t believe it could happen. I wasn’t absorbing it as a real goal. Now, it’s happening. I’m super delighted and excited.

Now I have this bigger fear where I’m like, “Oh my God, now I’m going to BE that person who makes seven figures.” To overcome this—do I need to make a decision to BE that person now?

Neagle Code Answer

Yes. You need to decide to be the person who makes seven figures.

It’s a double-sided decision. It’s the decision to become that person, and it’s also the decision to let go of the old one.

This can feel very much like someone’s about to die. Because someone is about to die. It’s very real.

It’s not a metaphor.

It’s real.

That’s the decision you have to make—to become this new person who makes seven figures.

Decide that earning this amount of money will become part of your new reality, your new experience, and your default.

Decide that you’ll continue doing the necessary things a 7-figure earner would do on a daily basis—including facing all those fears.

Use all the tools you have at your disposal and everything you’ve learned to stick to this commitment.

…And congratulations for making that decision!

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

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The Fear of Things Going Wrong in Business

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I want to maintain our high level of success, but fear keeps popping up—that something won’t happen, or something will go wrong. I know you’ve said many times you don’t eliminate fear, but I’m a slow learner. How do I eliminate fear and stay focused on the opportunity?

In chapter 5 of You Too, Can Be Prosperous, faith is defined as “the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” The last sentence says, “Faith is both Substance and evidence, both cause and effect.” Does this mean my faith makes me open and available for the cause of what I want to show up? Then I act on the cause, which creates the desired effect?

Neagle Code Answer

Yes, absolutely. Faith is both the substance and the evidence of something that’s not seen.

Remember, faith is a dual-edged sword. If you have faith in your fear, you’ll manifest your fear. Faith is something you can’t see, but it’s extremely powerful and will manifest whatever side you put it on.

If you think about the fear, you’re opening that door to cause it to be an issue for you.

As far as “eliminating fear,” you don’t eliminate it. Here’s the thing: your subconscious mind doesn’t want you to hear that. It blocks this stuff out, because if we don’t hear it, we can’t use it.

Fear is coming from a pattern that’s already in your subconscious mind. The subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between what’s real and imagined. Whether you have a fear that you actually experienced before, or you’re imagining a fear someone else gave you—when your subconscious mind goes to fear, it always views it as real.

Part of removing it is, you have to experience whatever the fear is about without actually experiencing what the fear suggests.

How do we do that without making the fear go away first? We use faith, courage, and confidence.

You tell yourself: “Okay, I’m afraid. I acknowledge I’m afraid, but I’m going to do the thing I need to do anyway.” The fear doesn’t get a voice in the decision. It’ll be screaming at you the whole damn time. But the more you continue to do it, it will subside.

The fear screams the loudest just prior to the decision. Once you make a real decision, fear subsides.

This is true with both business and personal stuff.

Part of the problem is, you don’t want to experience something going wrong. You need to change that. When things go wrong in business, it’s an opportunity.

Now, I’m not saying you need to sit and “make things go wrong all day,” but you need to not be afraid of anything going wrong. If it goes wrong, it goes wrong. We’re going to learn from it. It will open the door to something equal or greater. Bring it on.

It doesn’t matter what goes wrong. It always provides an opportunity for equal or greater benefit to what you were experiencing in every area of your life.

It happens, you move on, create the next thing, and keep moving forward.

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

Save

Why Do I Keep Losing Employees?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David,

I feel like I’m having abandonment issues with my employees. We’ve lost three or four in the last few years, and now we’re losing another one. I don’t think it’s related to me as a boss.

I’m taking on some of the tough work myself, like taking out the garbage, because it has to be done. I feel like I’m trying to buffer my employees from some of the real work, and it’s making me exhausted. Is this is an issue of abandonment?—or of not hiring the right person?

Neagle Code Answer

Here’s the thing: you’re not “losing” another employee. You’re transitioning a person through your company.

Let’s not look at it as a loss. It’s not a loss. It’s an opportunity for you, and it’s an opportunity for them.

You can look at everything you did right with this person and everything you did wrong, and you can become a better person with the next one you hire.

It’s always easier to do that than to try to change behaviors that have been going on too long with a current employee.

If you feel bad about what’s happening, you’re going to treat yourself badly. You’ll immediately go into a story of, “This is a loss. We’ve lost something.” What happens when you lose something? You grieve. You feel bad. You’re not celebratory about it.

You’re letting the wrong thinking get into your head. You guys should be like, “Woohoo! This is fantastic. It’s an opportunity for us to find the next rockstar for our business.”

It’s also about acceptance. People come and go in businesses. Most people in your business aren’t there for a lifetime. This isn’t a family. It’s more like a sports team.

If you start looking at it as a family, you’ll get attached. When you get attached, it doesn’t matter what the reason is—you’re going to be hurt when it’s time for that person to go, because it’s an unnatural attachment.

The problem is being caused by the fact that you don’t want to look at the reality of “people coming and going in a business,” because it makes you constantly have to do something you don’t like to do, but you have to do.

It’s easier to wish they wouldn’t leave than to become so damn good at hiring that it never disturbs you.

If you have to add another person to create a backup in case someone leaves, then absolutely do that—if you have a real need for that. But make sure you’re not making an emotional decision. Make the decision that’s best for the business.

What’s best for the business?

P.S. Whenever you're ready… here are 3 ways I can help you grow YOUR business:

  • Listen to The Successful Mind Podcast. Three times per week I drop cutting edge information and strategies relating to success mindset, leadership, wealth creation, and relationships.
  • Join other like-minded small business owners in my Transformation Facebook Group! Allow us to be a place to share ideas, get advice, and meet others who value truth and growth!
  • Join me at The Art of Success Virtual Summit! This October 2021, I'm getting a group of amazing business owners together for 3 days to work on exponentially growing their business.

Save

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