How do you deal with hate mail?

This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from Michele.

Neagle Code Question

Hi David!

How do you deal with hate email? I recently received an email from someone “DEMANDING” to be taken off my list. I didn’t put her on there, she opted in…and yet, her email was incredibly angry and on the verge of “abusive”.

My first reaction was that my fear of judgment kicked in and I felt horrible — and then had a physical response! Thankfully I was able to get past it and back on track, but how do you deal with these intense, paralyzing fears?

Neagle Code Answer

Great question!

The only way to “deal” with fear is to shine a light on it so that you can see that it’s a lie and then continue onward in spite of the feelings.

I know you’ve heard me say this before, but Spirit does not speak to you through fear, so anytime you feel that fear and hear those fearful voices in your head, you must stop and ask yourself whose voices those are.

Let’s go back to TRUTH. (My favorite place)

Fear is simply your ego’s way of stopping you from growing. And the fear was given to you by someone else, usually a parent or someone who had a significant role in your life.

The next time you feel fear, try identifying whose voice is talking to you because it will not be God’s.

So let’s go back to the first question you asked: How do you deal with hate mail?

My answer is that you don’t. You must understand that hate mail has everything to do with the person sending it and nothing to do with you.

You aren’t responsible for someone else’s thoughts, feelings and emotions; you are only responsible for your OWN.

Kudos to you for recognizing that it triggered your fear of judgment. If you focus your attention on why you have a fear of judgment in the first place, and let the hate mail go, the truth will set you free.

And always remember:

There is no growth without discomfort and it sounds like you’re GROWING!!!


PS: The Neagle Code: Directions for Life is a weekly no-cost program that is open to everyone! Each week, I'll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: to participate.


  1. Just reading the question I was immediately triggered around my issues with authority figures. Instantly the little voice in my head said: “you did something wrong, now you’re in trouble and someone is mad at you.” Once again your answer created a profound shift for me. Asking myself whose voice is this, literally brought me to tears. Your teachings are timeless!! Thank you David!!

    • That is so powerful Diane, and you can see how insidious those thoughts are. I greatly appreciate you sharing your reaction to this since I have no doubt it will have an effect on those who read this article. Remember to think about who’s voice is renting space in your head before you go to a place that will keep you exactly where you are at. Thanks for the post!