This week's question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from an individual who wishes to remain anonymous.
I am in a very painful relationship, and I know that I am responsible for it. I have been trying for a year now to work on myself (with many methods) but there is no improvement. My biggest confusion arises in me because I don't understand if I should leave the relationship or if I work enough on myself I will find myself happiness and in peace in this relationship. Can you clarify this for me?
Thanks for your question.
Have you ever heard the saying that people come in to our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime?
It's the truth, and knowing when to release a relationship can be a difficult decision.
If you're in a relationship with an abusive person, you can work on yourself for years and it still won't change them, and really it's not your right to try to change them.
You have to ask yourself why you're choosing to stay in the relationship if it's been so painful.
How is it serving you?
Are you a hope addict?
Are you staying the relationship in the hopes that your partner will change and everything will get better?
Are you afraid to be alone?
In a healthy relationship, both people have to be willing to work on themselves to achieve a joint goal. If one person is not willing to grow, over time it will create a wedge in the relationship, and it will flounder and fail.
Are you and your partner on the same page or are you changing who you are and sacrificing what you want to “make” the relationship work?
Answering these questions will help you see if it's time to leave.
Please keep in mind, if you are being abused in ANY way, you must make every effort to stop the abuse by putting up boundaries or you must leave the relationship. Period.
Remember, you may be responsible for the attracting all the relationships in your life, but that doesn't mean you have to tolerate a relationship if it is no longer serving you.
P.S: The Neagle Code: DIRECTIONS for LIFE is a weekly no-cost program that is open to everyone! Each week, I'll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: www.TheNeagleCode.com to participate.
P.P.S.: May I ask you to help me spread the word about this program? Is there someone you care for who is stuck, or struggling, or lost, or unhappy? Because if so, I would very much like to help. No matter their question, no matter their predicament, no matter if they've never heard of me before … if they would like to ask for help via www.TheNeagleCode.com, my Team and I will do our very best to provide that help.